11/14/07

are we really?

a recent conversation with a friend reminds me of the fallacy of 'all or nothing thinking,' not only as relates to the things we want and our ability to obtain them, but also in our assuming that a person must be either one thing or another. experience continues to teach me that who people are--and in turn, who i am--is often an untidy mixture that changes form over time. i also remember that my willingness to accept (or at least tolerate) these complexities in others allows me to do the same with myself.

8 comments:

Carleen Brice said...

Welcome back!!! Hope your time off was beneficial, but really, really glad you're posting again!

Loomnie said...

Yea, I understand that it is simplistic to put people in single boxes, but I think we do that in an attempt to understand and relate to people. But then, doing that deprives us of the pleasure of appreciating the nuances that a person's personality entails. It really is a virtue to open oneself to the different possibilities of a person's personalities, not just because it helps us against misunderstanding people, but also because it gives us the chance of understanding and appreciating ourselves.

Thanks a lot for this post! And I am really glad to see you posting again.

Ello said...

That was a long hiatus! But so happy to see you posting again as I love the thoughtfulness of your posts!

iyan and egusi soup: said...

thank you all! :)

Lisa said...

So nice to "hear your voice" again! I've always thought it kind of ironic that while we tend to assume things about other people -- and this especially pertains to people we've known for a long time, like family -- we dislike it when they tend to view us as who we were in the past, that they don't allow the possibility for change and growth. I'm learning that who I am today isn't necessarily who I was yesterday, so I have to guess the same holds true for everyone. Thanks for making me remember this.

iyan and egusi soup: said...

hi lisa,
i'm happy to hear from you too.

Sherry said...

What wisdom!! So truthfully spoken.
Glad to see you back!!!! Hope your hiatus was fruitful in so many ways.

iyan and egusi soup: said...

thank you sherry--yes, it was good to be away, and also good to be back.